There are all sorts of ways for LGBTQ+ couples to have children—and at Extraordinary Conceptions, we’ve been helping families come together this way for nearly two decades. It brings us so much joy to support the queer community and help more wonderful parents to raise amazing little humans!
If you are just beginning to navigate the path to parenthood, welcome! We know that, while exciting, this is a complex time that requires a lot of decision-making. One of these major decisions is which route to take. Many children of queer couples are adopted, while others were conceived through third-party reproductive assistance, like sperm/egg donation, surrogacy, or a combination of both.
Once you’re ready to talk seriously about your family-building options, you can get in touch with our team. We’ll be able to speak with you in greater detail about your unique needs. In the meantime, we’ve broken down some of the basics for you here.
Donation, Surrogacy, and Adoption by LGBTQ+ Parents: How Does it Work?
For LGBTQ+ couples, there are several main options for having children:
Egg Donation
The egg donor process is a type of fertility treatment which involves a third-party. In these cases, eggs are retrieved from another person (the donor) through a basic medical procedure. Those eggs are then fertilized and implanted into either a surrogate or an intended parent. The procedure is similar to IVF.
For queer families, the egg donor process typically also requires a surrogate. This will be a different person from your egg donor. Both your egg donor and your surrogate will be screened to ensure they meet legal requirements to undertake this role. As this is a complex process, we highly recommend using an agency to facilitate your egg donor journey.
Sperm Donation
This type of donation is a popular choice for LGBTQ+ couples where no sperm-producing anatomy is present. The sperm is then implanted into either an intended parent, or a surrogate.
While we do not currently offer these donor services at Extraordinary Conception, we have recommendations for fantastic sperm banks across the US, and are happy to facilitate contact.
Surrogacy
For couples where neither partner can carry a child, surrogacy is a well-regarded solution for family-building. This process involves using an IVF-like procedure to implant fertilized eggs into a third-party called a surrogate. Your surrogate will carry and give birth to your child, and you will immediately be granted parentage. Many LGBTQ+ couples will require donated eggs or sperm for surrogacy as well.
While surrogacy is complex, it is very exciting and special. To make sure that it goes smoothly, we highly recommend working with an experienced surrogacy agency. They will make sure that you have access to reliable, well-vetted surrogates and get plenty of support.
Adoption
Adoption is a beautiful way for vulnerable children to find homes with loving parents who will give them the good life they deserve. Many LGBTQ+ families choose to go down this road when they decide to have children.
At Extraordinary Conceptions, we are well-versed in the world of adoption, though it is not a service we offer. We are happy to refer you to an attorney for this process.
How Can My LGBTQ+ Family Prepare For Parenthood?
Community is key. Speak to your peers about their experience with surrogacy, donation, or adoption by LGBTQ+ parents. Real stories will be relatable and help you make your own choices.
Whether your family chooses adoption, surrogacy, or any other path to parenthood, your decision is personal to your needs. We suggest that prospective parents seek out real-life stories about adoption and surrogacy from other LGBTQ+ families. While you may not find another family exactly like yours, you will hopefully be able to speak with or read about couples whose needs you relate to.
At Extraordinary Conceptions, we’ve been helping bring families together since 2005. We’ve experienced joy with so many families—and many of them have written about their experience navigating surrogacy, egg donation, and adoption with our agency. We also offer first-hand experience through our incredible team, who are always available to support you during this exciting time. If you’re ready to start talking about options, get in touch with the Extraordinary Conceptions team for a conversation. Thank you for including us in your family’s story.